Post by The Pantheon Dragon on Feb 22, 2007 6:35:43 GMT -5
The first time I saw her,I performed the simplest act known to mankind,I gave her a smile.
They say you don't fall in love at first sight,that you have to search for the perfect person and sometimes it can take so long you wind up a homely cat lady anyways.But,sometimes I believe it can and does happen.I know one things for sure,it has happened to me;Jake.
It's kind of weird when and if it happens to you,let me explain.You make eye contact and it's like the world fades away from you.Your worries,your fears,your science test that you're frettin' about,sinks to the back of your mind.It's all replaced by the image of Rose.
That's the person I fell for.I saw her as flawless and even when I didn't know her all that well at first.I could picture her as free and fun-loving.The way her blue eyes shone when she locked them with mine,the way her golden hair lifted off her shoulders when the wind caught it and picked it up.That beautiful smile.I could pratically walk on air around her.
It was like a dream,a wonderful,perfect dream seeing her around.
Rose always seemed like she was there but she was just out of reach,usually she was with Brad shoving her around everywhere.But the second she accepted my offer to dance and the moment she approached me at the end of the dance,I knew something was offical.
This wasn't quite a dream any longer,she wasn't just a beautiful angel playing at my heart strings,she was more realistic.Now that I had more to work with,I started to try to win her over more.Including auditioning for a school play.That's when reality really took a huge U-turn,darnet.I couldn't even kiss her!But that didn't mean I gave up,I really did want to feel like she was more real.Kissing her would have made it all more real for me.Her more real.
Sometimes I wondered what she saw in me,Trixie advised me several times to steer clear of her and I shrugged off her dislike toward Rose.She got more naggy over time,um,this is something I'll come back to.Anyways,I tried my hands at sincerety.Because what I felt for her was sincere and asked her out.I really did like her and the dream feel was still there.
Our first date was awesome and since I was a regular in wood shop,I gave her the full on pleasure of letting her see my first attempt at an ice sculpture.That was when I first became aware of our height difference more closely.Man,I hate my height sometimes.But she was finally ready for this and so was I.I had to form a more stronger link with her and this was the way to do it,this was the way to make my dream of being with Rose more of a reality.
Let me tell you this,all that time I thought our first kiss would make this great,dreamy and sighingly instant infatuation with her more within reach,I was wrong.Totally dead wrong.
You don't know what it's like to have your heart ripped apart,I didn't want to believe what Trixie said was true.She was like the little voice in my head telling me something was going on and I needed to pay attention.I'll admitt something,sometimes I am blinded by my own wants and needs.I didn't realize it and a few times,it nearly costed my family or friend's life.
I'll be more basic in this case,it nearly cost me my life.For once I wasn't blinded by these feelings I had for a girl I saw off and on.I did go weak in the knees and my heart did start to sputter really fast,the typical reaction of a crush.But this never happened until I set my sights upon that symbol of a dragon on Rose's hand.The glove came off.No pun intended.
I wasn't mad,I was just disappointed.I wasn't sad,I was just trying to wake up from my dream that had just turned into a nightmare.Against my better judgement at the time I went and saved her.That's how strong my feelings had gotten,were,but I somewhat regretted it.
Saving her after she had dealt me such a low,it wasn't fair.No.
But it wasn't enough for her to die for,however,my feelings for her became distant once I'd gotten a chance to think about it and it made me wonder.Had I loved her for her or just as a sort of goddess from my daydreams?I blocked the thoughts from my mind and went on with my duties.I figured if I just avoided her and stopped any further contact,Rose would lose interest.There was a small part of me that still liked her but I didn't know how I did.
After near hit and misses with her over several weeks,after being uneasy with the side of her I liked,the side of her I had grown to disdain more then ever finally confronted me one night.I hadn't seen Thorn for a long time and my instant reaction was to do my whole Am Drag routine.I wasn't going to avoid her,maybe Rose but I had a score to settle with this side of her.She wasn't going to get away for being ungrateful,she was never going to win.
But when I found myself landed in a trap and chained to a pole waiting for the dumb Hunts pre-hunting ceremony thing,I realised that being stubborn wasn't going to help me win and really it had just about ended me.Some time passed when everyone left and in the midst of struggling against my chains,I came to the conclusion to try and appeal Rose,not Huntsgirl.
To try and just slip in a few words to wake her up.From what I'd seen of the Huntsman,he wasn't much different one way or another.So I thought,maybe there was a stronger reason then just destiney why Rose was doing this and I even told her so when she made her little visit after a while.Though I didn't get through really,she gave me two things:hope and fear.
Hope,because she had noticed my eyes were familiar and to which I must agree their not half bad lookin'.Again,no pun intended.And then fear.She seemed to be paying quite a bit of attention to human Jake but what would she do if she found I was one in the same?The time wasn't right to puzzle over this,I had to escape.Besides,she had made it pretty clear.
She intended to slay me and be like the Huntsman.But what got to me was that she didn't seem to have a choice.Rose was Thorn and Thorn was Rose.She was as mind-boggling as a jig saw puzzle,she was beautiful but had a dark streak in her a mile long.She cared and yet she couldn't care less.Still,it might not of been all her fault.But I didn't stick around long enough to ask more questions.I not only left to ensure the other's safety but my own.
All the time I was prepping the other magical creatures,something else kept nagging at me.
I was getting tired of being tracked down like a wild animal for all these months,no matter how much I didn't want to see Rose be put through this,in the end she had to help herself.
Somewhat hours later and thats were the big irony got me.It was either make the hugest and probably most stupidest admission to Thorn or get killed.At this point I had nothing to lose.Sure,my family and friends.But right in this moment,all that mattered was me and her.
Changing down was like pulling off a mask and announcing."Got'cha!It was only me."
And that's just it,it was only me.I was one and the same.The question was,was she?I saw the wild look in her blue eyes disappear the moment they took in my human form and for the first time,I felt a tinge of sadness.I hadn't before but all of a sudden,we were just two young teenagers looking into each other's eyes.When we looked at each other without any hatred,disappointment or anger,we were just two kids who had started to like each other.
The last thing she said was my name.She sounded shocked,big surprise,and at the time all that mattered was shutting my lids and letting her decide.I loved her still,but I hated her.It all happened so fast and she was gone.Without a second glance,she spared me and left.
My feelings were no longer mixed after I got another few moments to think about it while my name was being chanted.In fact,my new friends helped apt of my spirit once more and helped me to get a better grasp of the lighter side of the situation,Rose returned the favor.
It was like a great rush of relief mingled with happiness surged in me.As always it was too important to keep to myself and I even told Gramps and Fu.Everyone,with the exception of Trix who never liked her to begin with,seemed to agree with me that the good side,Rose's side,had prevailed.She liked me more then she hated me.Or had hated me.Heck,at this point I thought she might have even loved me...until I got the photo that is.
I had forgotten the silly thing,it was just a quick snapshot of us in the middle of the dance where we had paused and then resumed dancing.But now,it was the only thing I had left of her.I'll get back to what happened afterwards,let's just say it was a whole bigger deal then finding out she was the Huntsgirl.No,scratch that.It was WAY bigger then finding out.This affected me more then anything I cared to explain at the time.But finally,I'm ready to talk.
I'm ready to begin telling when I really started to feel what love was.
To be continued...
They say you don't fall in love at first sight,that you have to search for the perfect person and sometimes it can take so long you wind up a homely cat lady anyways.But,sometimes I believe it can and does happen.I know one things for sure,it has happened to me;Jake.
It's kind of weird when and if it happens to you,let me explain.You make eye contact and it's like the world fades away from you.Your worries,your fears,your science test that you're frettin' about,sinks to the back of your mind.It's all replaced by the image of Rose.
That's the person I fell for.I saw her as flawless and even when I didn't know her all that well at first.I could picture her as free and fun-loving.The way her blue eyes shone when she locked them with mine,the way her golden hair lifted off her shoulders when the wind caught it and picked it up.That beautiful smile.I could pratically walk on air around her.
It was like a dream,a wonderful,perfect dream seeing her around.
Rose always seemed like she was there but she was just out of reach,usually she was with Brad shoving her around everywhere.But the second she accepted my offer to dance and the moment she approached me at the end of the dance,I knew something was offical.
This wasn't quite a dream any longer,she wasn't just a beautiful angel playing at my heart strings,she was more realistic.Now that I had more to work with,I started to try to win her over more.Including auditioning for a school play.That's when reality really took a huge U-turn,darnet.I couldn't even kiss her!But that didn't mean I gave up,I really did want to feel like she was more real.Kissing her would have made it all more real for me.Her more real.
Sometimes I wondered what she saw in me,Trixie advised me several times to steer clear of her and I shrugged off her dislike toward Rose.She got more naggy over time,um,this is something I'll come back to.Anyways,I tried my hands at sincerety.Because what I felt for her was sincere and asked her out.I really did like her and the dream feel was still there.
Our first date was awesome and since I was a regular in wood shop,I gave her the full on pleasure of letting her see my first attempt at an ice sculpture.That was when I first became aware of our height difference more closely.Man,I hate my height sometimes.But she was finally ready for this and so was I.I had to form a more stronger link with her and this was the way to do it,this was the way to make my dream of being with Rose more of a reality.
Let me tell you this,all that time I thought our first kiss would make this great,dreamy and sighingly instant infatuation with her more within reach,I was wrong.Totally dead wrong.
You don't know what it's like to have your heart ripped apart,I didn't want to believe what Trixie said was true.She was like the little voice in my head telling me something was going on and I needed to pay attention.I'll admitt something,sometimes I am blinded by my own wants and needs.I didn't realize it and a few times,it nearly costed my family or friend's life.
I'll be more basic in this case,it nearly cost me my life.For once I wasn't blinded by these feelings I had for a girl I saw off and on.I did go weak in the knees and my heart did start to sputter really fast,the typical reaction of a crush.But this never happened until I set my sights upon that symbol of a dragon on Rose's hand.The glove came off.No pun intended.
I wasn't mad,I was just disappointed.I wasn't sad,I was just trying to wake up from my dream that had just turned into a nightmare.Against my better judgement at the time I went and saved her.That's how strong my feelings had gotten,were,but I somewhat regretted it.
Saving her after she had dealt me such a low,it wasn't fair.No.
But it wasn't enough for her to die for,however,my feelings for her became distant once I'd gotten a chance to think about it and it made me wonder.Had I loved her for her or just as a sort of goddess from my daydreams?I blocked the thoughts from my mind and went on with my duties.I figured if I just avoided her and stopped any further contact,Rose would lose interest.There was a small part of me that still liked her but I didn't know how I did.
After near hit and misses with her over several weeks,after being uneasy with the side of her I liked,the side of her I had grown to disdain more then ever finally confronted me one night.I hadn't seen Thorn for a long time and my instant reaction was to do my whole Am Drag routine.I wasn't going to avoid her,maybe Rose but I had a score to settle with this side of her.She wasn't going to get away for being ungrateful,she was never going to win.
But when I found myself landed in a trap and chained to a pole waiting for the dumb Hunts pre-hunting ceremony thing,I realised that being stubborn wasn't going to help me win and really it had just about ended me.Some time passed when everyone left and in the midst of struggling against my chains,I came to the conclusion to try and appeal Rose,not Huntsgirl.
To try and just slip in a few words to wake her up.From what I'd seen of the Huntsman,he wasn't much different one way or another.So I thought,maybe there was a stronger reason then just destiney why Rose was doing this and I even told her so when she made her little visit after a while.Though I didn't get through really,she gave me two things:hope and fear.
Hope,because she had noticed my eyes were familiar and to which I must agree their not half bad lookin'.Again,no pun intended.And then fear.She seemed to be paying quite a bit of attention to human Jake but what would she do if she found I was one in the same?The time wasn't right to puzzle over this,I had to escape.Besides,she had made it pretty clear.
She intended to slay me and be like the Huntsman.But what got to me was that she didn't seem to have a choice.Rose was Thorn and Thorn was Rose.She was as mind-boggling as a jig saw puzzle,she was beautiful but had a dark streak in her a mile long.She cared and yet she couldn't care less.Still,it might not of been all her fault.But I didn't stick around long enough to ask more questions.I not only left to ensure the other's safety but my own.
All the time I was prepping the other magical creatures,something else kept nagging at me.
I was getting tired of being tracked down like a wild animal for all these months,no matter how much I didn't want to see Rose be put through this,in the end she had to help herself.
Somewhat hours later and thats were the big irony got me.It was either make the hugest and probably most stupidest admission to Thorn or get killed.At this point I had nothing to lose.Sure,my family and friends.But right in this moment,all that mattered was me and her.
Changing down was like pulling off a mask and announcing."Got'cha!It was only me."
And that's just it,it was only me.I was one and the same.The question was,was she?I saw the wild look in her blue eyes disappear the moment they took in my human form and for the first time,I felt a tinge of sadness.I hadn't before but all of a sudden,we were just two young teenagers looking into each other's eyes.When we looked at each other without any hatred,disappointment or anger,we were just two kids who had started to like each other.
The last thing she said was my name.She sounded shocked,big surprise,and at the time all that mattered was shutting my lids and letting her decide.I loved her still,but I hated her.It all happened so fast and she was gone.Without a second glance,she spared me and left.
My feelings were no longer mixed after I got another few moments to think about it while my name was being chanted.In fact,my new friends helped apt of my spirit once more and helped me to get a better grasp of the lighter side of the situation,Rose returned the favor.
It was like a great rush of relief mingled with happiness surged in me.As always it was too important to keep to myself and I even told Gramps and Fu.Everyone,with the exception of Trix who never liked her to begin with,seemed to agree with me that the good side,Rose's side,had prevailed.She liked me more then she hated me.Or had hated me.Heck,at this point I thought she might have even loved me...until I got the photo that is.
I had forgotten the silly thing,it was just a quick snapshot of us in the middle of the dance where we had paused and then resumed dancing.But now,it was the only thing I had left of her.I'll get back to what happened afterwards,let's just say it was a whole bigger deal then finding out she was the Huntsgirl.No,scratch that.It was WAY bigger then finding out.This affected me more then anything I cared to explain at the time.But finally,I'm ready to talk.
I'm ready to begin telling when I really started to feel what love was.
To be continued...