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Post by Azure Skies on May 31, 2007 5:39:59 GMT -5
Ah yes, this is my main fanfiction.
The main plotline involves a character I made up name Carly Anderson, a 17 year old girl with dragon powers. Her dad is Nicholas "Nick" Anderson, who has lost an eye in a fight and is going blind in the other. They, as dragons, are commiting a series of burglaries in various shops in New York City. Jake, his grandfather and the detective Feng have to stop them, but they are in the dark about what the duo's true motives are.
Carly really plans to kill Jake to take over the world. Not like the Dark Dragon's plan to kill all humans, just plain, stereotypical villain takes over world matter. Like Shego in A Sitch In Time.
Nick has his own plans, which unfold as the story goes on. He also is on the taking over the world plan as well and plans to help.
But there are plenty of sideplots as well. You know the Feng character mentioned? Yep, roleplaying dragon slayer character Feng. Hehe, based the roleplaying character off the fanfic character, but back to the point. One of the sideplots revolves around the main plot. Since you'll probably notice that Lao Shi and Feng literally hate each other, yet the best way to defeat the Andersons is to work together, so the sideplot is them vieing for Jake's trust. Also, Feng trys to forget her more than rough past.
I also introduce Ben Sie, Feng's assistant. He doesn't do any fighting, since he isn't mentioned to have any powers in Part I. His sister Jen plays a smaller role, and does no fighting as well. they both get more of a role after Part I.
I am just finishing up on chapter one (June 22. The fanfiction is divided by days.)
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Post by YFWE on May 31, 2007 8:12:47 GMT -5
Sounds pretty sweet and stuff. Hope you get the chapter up soon!! =]
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Post by Azure Skies on Jun 2, 2007 5:58:45 GMT -5
Okay, here's Chapter One.
June 22, 2007: It was the last day of school in New York City, and the students, particulary at Millard Fillmore Middle School, were as happy as can be. Jake Long was excited as well. But who wouldn't like a few months of no school, homework or stress. And for him, no dragon training, at least for a day. Also, his parents were going to be out for the evening, so he had a good amount of freedom today. But he had the strangest feeling someone was following him.
Carly Anderson had gotten out of school too. She was a high schooler who's looks could give one the impression of fire and ice. (Red hair with a blue outfit, what else would you think?!) She also had sharp green eyes which didn't really match any of her style, but green eyes and redheads seem to go together, oddly. This oddly styled teenager was also very tall (about 5' 7") and with a solid and slightly muscular build (about 135-145 lbs). Carly had no homework today and this seemed to be a day where she didn't have to go to her job at the Loter hotel in Times Square. Why she was surveying Jake out of all people, you'll figure out later.
Jake decided to go to the movies that day to eat up some time and since a good one had just come out last week. And why not contribute to the box office? Carly had her mind set on the independent college film that creeped its ways into theaters, "Dawn of the Dragon", but since it was about a young Asian dragon slayer, and due to the fact Jake was a dragon, she thought it would have to wait.
Jake had his mind set on another movie, so Carly did have to wait. She got a ticket and walked in, trying to keep a low profile while still keeping an eye on Jake. It was hard though. There were numerous crowds and a good amount of people taller than Carly, but she managed to follow Jake into theater 7 and watch the movie.
For the 114 minutes that the film ran, Jake had no idea who Carly was or that she was there. Only when they left, Jake noticed someone was following him.
"Do I know you from anywhere?" he asked.
"No, I don't think so."
"What's your name?"
"Carly Nicolette Anderson, but please, just call me Carly."
"Jake Long."
"Hmm, Jake, I like that name," replied Carly. "I've never seen you before," commented Jake. "I moved here last August from Washington D.C. I like it here in New York, though I miss all my old friends and the government my dad worked for," replied Carly. "Wow, your dad worked for the government!" he exclaimed. "Yes he did, and my mom had an interesting career as a doctor. My older sister is good with music, which is very weird for our family," said Carly.
"So, considering your family, are you a super-genius or something?" asked Jake. "I was measured to have a pretty high IQ, just enough to get into MENSA," replied Carly. Jake looked at her confused. "You have no clue what MENSA is do you," said Carly in an indifferent tone. "It's something to do with smart people, right?" asked Jake. Carly nodded. It had something to do with that.
So Jake said good bye to Carly and went skateboarding for about an hour as Carly headed to the Loter hotel as her dad's shift was going to be over soon. Then Jake headed home, maybe to check on his sister or to play some video games. When he arrived home, he saw Haley reading some book and Fu Dog boredly watching. "This is not what I expected when mom said she'd hire a babysitter," muttered Jake.
Bored, Jake paced a bit until he remembered something else that he could do to eat up time. Some rumor was going around about some mysterious burglaries committed by a pair of dragons. Anything can be better than pacing the floor, so Jake set out for a bit of crime fighting.
The most recent ones were said to be at or very close to Times Square, so within a very short amount of time, Jake was surveying the skies for any suspicious activity. For a few moments there was nothing except for an airplane or two headed to some far off place in the U.S, until something of particular interest flew by.
It was long, dark green and slender, probably a detective in this case. Once it stopped, Jake finally realized its partial identity; a female dragon, probably Chinese or a related country, most likely in her mid-40's. She was quite fast as well, as anyone could notice.
"Where are they?" she muttered.
Jake approached this mysterious dragon. "Who are you exactly?" he asked. "Feng is what most call me, counting the nicknames they've given me over time," she replied, "Have you seen two dragons, muscular frame, most likely related?"
"No, you're the only dragon I've seen," answered Jake.
Feng immediately tried to rush off for no particular reason. There was no suspicious activity that anyone could see and oddly, not many humans could be watching them either. Jake scratched his head and wondered why, then tried following her.
"Hey Feng! Why'd you run off like that?"
"Um, I felt as if someone was watching me, and a little fact about me is I hate people watching me," replied Feng. Just after saying that, she retreated again.
Jake decided to go back and see what made the mysterious dragon run off like that. Soon enough, he was facing an older, blue dragon, now getting angry with him. It was Lao Shi, who apparently, by the looks on his face, didn't really like Feng too much. "Jake, why is Feng working with this case?" he asked in a harsh and angry tone. Jake couldn't answer, just until about 10 minutes ago, he had no clue that she existed, lest say worked on this case.
But in a fit of honesty, Jake replied, "Gramps, I had no clue she existed until 10 minutes ago." Feng was gone by then, but maybe a little too early. In the horizon was the figure of two dragons rushing off as if something was chasing them. Jake rushed off to pursue these felons, and maybe tell Feng she left too soon.
After what seemed like a long time of surveying the New York City horizon and flying at a speed of over 100 mph, Jake followed the criminals to an alley, and now got a good look at them.
The female dragon had a stocky looking frame and green eyes, and was medium-dark blue color, along with reddish-colored hair. Her accomplice was a redhead as well, but was probably years older than his companion and had an eye patch with more of a grey shade in his eyes. He was also more muscle-bound than his partner in crime.
It took about 30 seconds for Feng to fly in. "So, we meet again dragon, but I can see you've brought a friend with you," said Feng to the male dragon. "Yes, a lot of things have changed since '99, but I still have the same intents," he replied. His female accomplice eyed Jake, a little like a judge at a dog show eyes a dog, but without having to look at every aspect of him. She smirked with delight and commented saying, "I've been tracking the American Dragon for years, and I think I've got a good reason to stay in New York." Jake didn't know the meaning of her words, but in 15 days would figure out.
"Dad, get the green one! The American Dragon's mine!," yelled the young accomplice. She gave Jake a few blows in between the shoulder blades, which Jake soon learned was a pressure point. But a calm, almost hypnotic feeling overcame him. But he tried to fight her while his eyes twitched and mind ceased to race. "What's happening?" he asked himself. "Jake! Don't look into her eyes!," warned a voice. "Gramps! What are you doing here? Don't you hate almost everyone fighting in this alley?" replied Jake, a bit sarcastically. Jake looked away from his opponent, but in a flash the entire alley was quiet. And Feng decided to follow the duo until they were caught.
But poor Feng was unsucessful and decided it was enough adventure for one night.
Jake returned home, wondering "Who is Feng and what is up with her?" He didn't tell that to anyone though, maybe wait until tomorrow or the day after to say anything about her.
Carly was at home, researching online to figure out more about the American Dragon. Although she had high speed internet, it loaded a little slow on her computer, considering that the machine was 3 years old. A JPEG image suddenly loaded onto the screen. It was a photo, probably for tabloids, in black and white, that showed Jake as a dragon and in the other half, him as a human. Text below it said "New York City teenager suspected to be dragon!" Carly could easily believe that. "I am chasing the right person," she thought, saving the image into her password protected folder. She then learned that particular copy of that issue never made it onto newstands. But they still had the prototype image, good news for Carly. She then opened up her little word processor.
"July 7, you'll be mine Jake,” said Carly, leaning back in her black office chair. At last, her word processor loaded. "Dang! I need a new computer!," she yelled. Her dad came into the room. "Any ideas on where to hit tomorrow Carly?" he asked. "Anywhere that has good computers. Mine takes forever to load anything," Carly replied. "Fine by me! I also need some more memory for mine, so tomorrow night, we raid Terabyte Town," he said as he quietly left the room. Carly then wrote in her computer journal her latest entry.
"Dear Diary,
I finally met Jake Long in real life, as a human and as a dragon. He is quite a good specimen for my plot. He has another female assistant my dad told me he wants to test a few things on. Must have been a government toy. Jake, however, won't be so lucky.
Stole from a local jewelry store tonight. Am soon gonna go to my favorite restaurant for my birthday. School ended today."
Carly then brushed her hair, put in her headband and slipped on her polished black boots to go to dinner. A great meal of a 12 ounce steak and one or two side dishes deserved a less casual appearance.
Feng returned home as well, now as a scrawny and casual looking human. After getting a few bandages, she went to the basement of her apartment to check on her small special effects shop. To her surprise, her only official employee, Ben, was nonchalantly working away there, probably on a separate commission.
Now, let me take a minute to introduce you to Ben. He has known Feng for two years now ever since he started working for her. He was a Chinese-American teenager with a noticeable California accent. Ben was of average height, 5' 8" to be exact, and of medium build. His hair usually stuck up a bit in cowlicks and hid the sunglasses which were casually held above his eyes. Ben was a very bright person, but his style wasn't very nerdy. It consisted of a pair of denim baggy pants, a camouflage vest and white shirt.
"Ben, I never expected you here, tonight, in my normally locked up shop," said Feng. "Yeah, I think you gave me the key when I first got employed," replied Ben, "I'm just working on a remote control for someone. Seems they have a short circuit in there. You have a new comission for tomorrow, someone made some homemade guns and rifles and wants you to test them. What have you been doing all night?"
"I was working on the case of some dragon burglaries," answered Feng. "Ah, trying to revive the good rep," he replied, now taking some time off from his project.
"Wait, how did you know that?" she asked. "Duh, everything you do for the greater good all leads to one motive, regaining trust and friendship," answered Ben.
"Trust isn't a bad thing," replied Feng, as she walked off upstairs, mulling over the events of tonight.
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Post by YFWE on Jun 2, 2007 21:52:45 GMT -5
Holy crap.
I seriously have never said this to like anyone before, but you TOTALLY remind me of myself when I first started writing. I don't know how... it's just kinda like... for some reason, it reminds me of my first fic. Not in storyline or anything, but in... style and the way it's written. So you KNOW I'm gonna keep reading!! =] Update soon!
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Post by Azure Skies on Jun 3, 2007 5:28:44 GMT -5
Yeah, I've never read any of your fics, and that's the writing style I've had for a long time.
And now you see why it takes so long to write a chapter!
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Post by YFWE on Jun 3, 2007 16:55:48 GMT -5
^ I wasn't implying that you were copying or anything... 0_o XD
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